#522 | Tuesday, December 18th 2001
i was going outside to work in my roses and put my radio headset as usual to listen to bill handell on kfi.he was going on about the first plane crash i thought he was doing a radio drama like war of the worlds.after hearing that the first tower had fallen it occurred to me that there had been no commericals and it wasn`t until the second tower fell i realized this over the top occurance wasn`t a radio drama but true.as i sit here now i am covered in goose bumps and crying remembering that moment and even today dec 18th it still isn`t fully real.where i live i usually hear some high flying jets but working outside as is my usual every hour or so it would occur to me in a flash that i had not heard a plane and the full horror of the falling buildings flooded in.i still am looking into an abyss trying to fathom this horror and trying to believe the hatred that drove these men to do what they did.i have never hated anything bad enough to do more than avoid the catalyst.the mind recoils in horror at such black hatred totally numbed in shock.and yes my feelings toward my country has changed.being born to the manor as it were i never realized how great it is.the flag i ignored and just grumbled about taxes.now i love seeing my flag flying and if i wern`t too old i`d join in doing military duty for my country.yes,i have finally realized i love and honor my home,my country the united states of america, asa
asa walker | 55 | California

#490 | Tuesday, December 18th 2001
I'm normally up early in the morning to look after the hundreds of emails I get a day. After sunrise seeing that it was a beautiful day. Clear blue skies, pleasantly warm, I decided that I would check the local weather, to see how the day was going to be. It was around 9:00 am. To my surprise when I turned on the TV, I saw the first tower with smoke coming from the top of it, and heard the newsperson say that a plane had crashed into the building. I sat down stunned, while the camera was focussed on the building, I saw another plane approaching the towers, the plane seemed a little low. At first I thought he would pull up, but no that did not happen. The second plane hit the second tower.
What was happening? Are the pilots sleeping? This was unbelievable. I checked to see if this was a news real or just a movie. It was real. Sitting there wondering how and why this could happen, the second tower collapsed, then later the first collapsed. Knowing that in those buildings a lot of people worked, a sick cold feeling came over me. then later another news real from the pentagon stating that a plane had crashed into it, made me realise that there was a war gong on. My day was ruined. Sitting there still stunned with tears in my eyes, I noticed that it was ging onto noon. And a reporter stating that a forth plane was missing.
Around this time a friend called from his workplace, and was listeng to the radio on his lunch time and could not believe that it was real. Hardly being able to talk, I tried to explain, what had transpired over the morning, that it was real and that I had watched this horrifying event on tv. Finally be sucummed with tears, and not able to talk properly, I told him I have to go, and hung up the phone. Later that afternoon, the realization of the fourth plane crashing had been announced. This was really too much. I was parrallised with fear, today was not a day to go anywhere. These events affected me over the next two months.
You see, I have cousins who are computer experts, and travel the world, and are involved greatly with world trade. How was I to call my Aunt and ask if she knew their wareabouts. Since then we heard from one, the other we will not here from until New Years. My biggest fear was, were they at the World Trade Centre, or possibly a passenger on one of the planes. I was always afraid of airplanes, now I'm terrified of them. At that time I was debating whether or not to go to Hawihi, now that is put off indeffinately.
I know how the families of those that were lost in these tragadies feel, and will never be able to forget, the loss, the anger, the fear, the hate that results from such an expirence. And nothing that anyone can say, will ever be able to change it.
America learned that day how to stand together, hope that will always remain.
God bless America, and take away the pain.

Doug CLEWLEY | 55 | Canada

#437 | Monday, December 10th 2001
I was making my wife breakfast and the TV in the dining room was on, which I could watch from the kitchen, when I saw the first images of the first tower with smoke billowing from near the top. The reporter was giving a report about the collision when the second aircraft struck.

I was a Middle East expert for Army Intelligence for 23 years and I remembered that I had predicted just such an attck. I have followed Bin Laden's escapades for years. Just recently, I told a fried of mine that something was brewing.

I was disgusted with the way the intelligence agencies have been underfunded for a number of years. I was appalled that we didn't know ahead of time and I was particularly agitated with Mr. Clinton for allowing this situation to get to this point.

Most of all, I felt sorry for the families of the people who perished and, as for the people who died, I prayed that they did not suffer. My heart goes out to them all. To to police and firemen who died doing their duty, I render a heart-felt solute of one comrade in arms to another. God keep you. You are all heroes.

Sam Avera | 55 | Washington

#407 | Sunday, December 9th 2001
My husband (Medical Director) calls me (I'm a lawyer in Connecticut) around 9:00 am from his office that looks over the Hudson river and the WTC. He told me he turned and looked outside while sipping his coffee and sees a big black hole with flames comming out of the WTC building (first attack). His voice is tentative but calm. He is a doctor - he does not panic. He knows what he sees but his voice sounds like maybe he wasn't seeing what his eyes were telling him. I tell him nothing was on the internet yet but go and find out what was going on. He calls back and says that there is another hole in the other WTC building. I panic and say - Get home right now. Home is Connecticut - he needs to take a subway uptown to Grand Central and get a Metro North train to Connecticut. While driving to a Court hearing an hour later, he calls me on my cell and says it is pandamonium here in the City, I'll try to get home if they do not need me. All telphones are down and they are securing his building. I tell him about the pentagon. He is cut off. He gets home many hours later. He works the entire next day in my office setting up crisis centers for the survivors. He talks about those he knows at the WTC. He will never be the same. He is now part of a research team examining the post traumatic effect of the attack.
Laura S. Mitler | 55 | Connecticut

#315 | Saturday, December 8th 2001
I was asleep when the phone rang. I rolled over, head under pillow. It was 10 AM. The phone kept ringing and I got up groggily to answer. It must be important. My daughter was calling hysterically. "The babies, how do I keep them safe!!" Huh? From what? Turn on the TV, Mom!

You woke me up to see a stupid movie? NO!! This is real! The fog in the brain took a while to lift and then it started to sink in.

Stay home and off the roads. They don't want you or the babies. Relax and let me absorb this. Then came pure fury! How dare they! Whoever they were!

Never, ever threaten my kith and kin!! The tears, the anger, the rage! It just poured! If any of mine had been there, I swear I would have killed you personally!! My anger was the worst part, the killing rage. I'm so happy the rage has left and it's just a solomn vow to avenge!!


Turk McGee | 55 | Florida

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